Platform Rage, The London Workers Disease

Everyone who works in London probably experiences what I like to call “Platform Rage”.  Everyday many of us like to choose the same spot on the platform so that we can be first through the train doors in an effort to get the valuable seats.

Each day an element of judgement plus luck is needed as the train will never stop at exactly the same spot.

However, every day each passenger chooses their spot and awaits to see who is the lucky person to be nearest the door.  However there are some people who in my mind aggrevate me so much that I today found myself having a go at a complete stranger.

These people are the people who don’t rely on luck or if they see someone in the prime position will, in their minds subtly, but in my mind obvious and sneaky, shuffle along the platform and quite rudely try and position themselves in front of you.

To try and avoid this daily battle I have found myself standing closer and closer to the edge of the platform, over the safe distance yellow line the rail company kindly place on the platform to stop you being sucked in by fast passing trains.  However it seems that a rather large and thus not subtle lady has taken it upon herself to shuffle as close as possible to the edge of the platform where I am standing and then just as the doors open she pushes me out of the way and climbs on board.

This made me so angry today I shouted at her “don’t mind me”.  It is not really the fact she did it, it is more the fact that she spends the ten minutes of time while we wait for the train slowly shuffling in front of me.  Does she think I am blind?  Does she think I don’t notice?  Either way tomorrow will be just the same old repetition but I am going to up my game, I will stand on the edge of the platform, I will be standing in the prime position (subject to the tube running on time) and I will use my old rugby tactics to block the fat oaf of a woman and let her realise that in Britain we queue, we do not jump and we especially don’t invade another persons personal space!  Maybe if she didn’t sit down each day she may lose some of her weight!


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